post_anon (![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} post_anon) wrote in colinospearkeep, |
The walls fell?
Are you trying to tell us, that you couldn't drive her away before anything had a chance to get started with your "I'm planning to move, so any relationship is temporary." line?
If she got past that picket line of defense, I can see how you have fallen. I mean, maybe whe was willing to take a shot despite your faint aspirations of moving to "the mountains." Or maybe she just saw through your petty ploy to keep everyone at a distance. It's safe to fall for the "every cute girl" but there is danger is "actually falling for someone." Maybe a worldly 36 year old is what you really needed! There is a wide valley between 25 and 35 in world views. It is sad really, when older guys keep seeking the younger women, thinking they "can still pass". I suppose there is something sad in finally admitting you need to stop looking at the "bar crowd" and turn your eyes to the "divorced or single mom" crew. But really, is it that bad? I don't think so. But maybe I am more of a realist. Calling things like I see them as best I can given the filters of my experience and the blinders of my own situation.
I am happy for you Colin. In reading your sparse-of-late, journal entries, I have come to think of you as an anonymous friend. Maybe it's because you wear your heart on your sleeve more than you realize, or maybe it's your funny, poetic, idealistic streak a mile wide. The mountains. They are a 14 hour drive my friend, they are not going anywhere. Ride this relationship out, the mountains will wait. Maybe you can go there together, or maybe love will bring the mountains to you.
Can't wait to hear more!
Are you trying to tell us, that you couldn't drive her away before anything had a chance to get started with your "I'm planning to move, so any relationship is temporary." line?
If she got past that picket line of defense, I can see how you have fallen. I mean, maybe whe was willing to take a shot despite your faint aspirations of moving to "the mountains." Or maybe she just saw through your petty ploy to keep everyone at a distance. It's safe to fall for the "every cute girl" but there is danger is "actually falling for someone." Maybe a worldly 36 year old is what you really needed! There is a wide valley between 25 and 35 in world views. It is sad really, when older guys keep seeking the younger women, thinking they "can still pass". I suppose there is something sad in finally admitting you need to stop looking at the "bar crowd" and turn your eyes to the "divorced or single mom" crew. But really, is it that bad? I don't think so. But maybe I am more of a realist. Calling things like I see them as best I can given the filters of my experience and the blinders of my own situation.
I am happy for you Colin. In reading your sparse-of-late, journal entries, I have come to think of you as an anonymous friend. Maybe it's because you wear your heart on your sleeve more than you realize, or maybe it's your funny, poetic, idealistic streak a mile wide. The mountains. They are a 14 hour drive my friend, they are not going anywhere. Ride this relationship out, the mountains will wait. Maybe you can go there together, or maybe love will bring the mountains to you.
Can't wait to hear more!
